Chelsey Chats #1: January 2025

my first monthly newsletter with highlights, tidbits, and book talk

Welcome to my first monthly newsletter! While I have many things to write and share that are focused on a specific topic, I also run across a variety of things that in previous seasons, I might have shared on social media. However, I am moving away from that in order to focus on writing, so each month I plan to check in with a hodgepodge of shorter thoughts, links, the books I’ve read that month, and more. I’d truly love to hear feedback from you on my first month on Substack, so please comment on this post or reply to the email and let me know your thoughts!

I truly did not know what to expect when I hit publish on December 30, 2024. I had told a few friends I was thinking about writing, and I assumed that I would have about 10 of my friends reading whatever I ended up posting. Imagine my surprise as the days ticked by and I continued to gain new subscribers. Many of you are people I know who saw me share on Facebook or Instagram. But recently there are subscribers who I don’t know, who I guess have found me on Substack. I truly have no idea. In any case, I am so glad to have you all here, and I especially appreciate the support from those of you who have chosen to become paid subscribers despite the fact that I don’t have any extra paid content! Your encouragement and investment in my writing mean the world to me. To those who have commented and replied to me through email, I have read every word and treasured your thoughtfulness. Thank you.

I think I have settled into a posting pattern this month that feels sustainable. Going forward, I hope to post a longer form essay on Monday mornings. On Fridays, look for something related to books. There may be other posts in between, but those two will hopefully both be something you can expect each week.

I also wanted to mention that I had my first small commission this week from a book someone purchased on Amazon after clicking through a link on a book roundup. If you purchase anything after clicking through to Amazon from my Substack, I will earn about 25% of the cost of a cup of coffee at my favorite coffee shop. Thank you to whoever did this—I hope you enjoy your book!

Finally, I’ve added a page called Book Roundups to my website. It’s an easy place to keep track of all my book posts!

I have increasingly felt too attached to my phone. It so often feels like a distraction, like something that calls to me and to which I respond even when I don’t really need to. In an attempt to change this, I took Facebook and Instagram off my phone. I also removed my e-mail app, as well as the Substack app, which has so much good content but that I was getting too entrenched in. I can check those things on my computer (I use Facebook for our women’s ministry at church, as well as some other groups, so I can’t get rid of it for good). I can watch the funny reels my friends and husband send me on Instagram without getting sucked into scrolling myself. I also took off the NYT Games app, because I just found myself spending too much time on the crosswords and other games each day. They’re certainly less odious than something like Candy Crush, but they still sucked me into something I didn’t really want to be doing.

Another change I’ve made this month is not getting on my phone first thing in the morning. For the past two weeks, when my alarm goes off on my phone, I turn it off, but then I don’t touch my phone again. My morning routine on a weekday is to get up at 5:30, have 30 minutes to drink coffee and read, and then the morning bustle begins. I wake up our ninth grader at 6, and I leave with him at 6:30. I’m only gone for a few minutes, so when I get back at 6:40 or so, I then have another 20 minutes before the other kids get up. In that 20 minutes, I finally start checking my phone and transitioning into the day. Those first 30 minutes of no phone have been transformative. I’ve been able to read more deeply and spend time journaling and praying without distraction. I hope to stick with this for the foreseeable future.

First of all, why has January lasted for approximately an eternity?

January is always an interesting month after the letdown of the holidays combined with the energy of a new year. We had a really relaxing Christmas break overall, and I really enjoyed playing games with the kids and watching our younger two especially enjoy their Christmas presents (American Girl dolls and LEGO were the big hits this year).

The two branch libraries nearest us both do a LEGO club regularly, and after not going for several months, we made it back in January. Sometimes there is a “challenge,” and sometimes it’s just a freestyle building session. Both Zoe (7) and Noah (4) love it, and I love being there with them.

Another highlight this month was getting to spend two whole days with a group of ladies for what they call “Craft Weekend.” I got connected through a dear friend once she found out about my love of cross stitch and quilting. Although many of these ladies have been doing this together for over a decade, they welcomed me with open arms. I was encouraged to bring some of what I’ve made in the past to “show and tell,” and I got bucket loads of encouragement from these veteran crafters when I laid out all the cross stitch items on a table for them to see.

These items represent the last three years of cross stitch (I have made more than this, but those items have been gifted!). I’d never really looked at it all at once, and I realized that I do spend a lot of my free time cross stitching, and I regret it not at all. It is such a cathartic hobby for me, and I love getting to look at what I’ve made.

I also made significant progress on my first real quilt during Craft Weekend. I hit a snag and wasn’t able to finish, but then I found some time during our unexpected Snow Week to get it done. It is by no means perfect, but it is now what I’m cuddling up under on cold mornings. Yes, it is a Christmas quilt, but until I make another quilt, it’s going to stay in my reading room.

Another highlight this month was a once-in-a-decade snowstorm! We’ve lived in south Georgia for five years, and it has never snowed. Our younger two kids had never seen snow. But on the night of January 21, the snow started falling and remained on the ground for days. The kids missed the entire week of school because the roads were too bad for buses and cars. It was an unexpected break, which brings its own challenges, but it was also full of so many fun memories, including how to keep your sweet summer children warm when you have no snow gear whatsoever.

The final big highlight of this month was our oldest son turning *fifteen.* That’s a 1 and a 5. If we’re rounding up, he’s now closer to 20 than he is to when he was 10. Stephen is on his way to becoming an adult, and I don’t know what I’d do without his help around the house and with his siblings. I can have real conversations with him about important things, including the gospel. He’s halfway through ninth grade and is on the healthcare track at his magnet high school. He is involved in band and plays the tuba and has also joined the E-sports team, which involves playing video games in competitions (who knew that was a thing—welcome to 2025).

This section of the newsletter will just be random things I found interesting this month.

• First on the list is this Oreo Cheesecake recipe. Stephen wanted a cookies and cream cheesecake for his birthday. I did a little research, found this recipe, and here was the finished product:

• One of my favorite YouTubers is Dawn Madsen, The Minimal Mom. I am part of her membership group and this month she shared that she realized that running a household is like running a small business. This perspective was mind-blowing to me. As the manager of my home, I’m dealing with inventory, a budget, tasks, transportation, food prep… and keeping it all in order really is like running a small business where I’m the main employee and most of the rest of the staff are simultaneously volunteers/customers (not my husband—he’s my co-manager!). I have thought about this so many times this month. It has actually helped me purposefully build rest into my days, because if I don’t, I’m essentially working a 17-hour day every single day.

• I greatly respect Sheila Wray Gregoire for her previous writing. Not only is she coming out with a new book on marriage, written with her husband, but she recently wrote her first Substack post debunking the conventional evangelical idea that men want respect and women want love.

• Lynn Lyons and her podcast have changed my life over the past year. A recent episode on how to stop ruminating gave me a lot to chew on. If you haven’t explored Lynn and her teaching on anxiety, this episode is a great introduction.

This will be my favorite part of the newsletter each month, because there is little I love more than talking about books.

First—here are some books I recommended this month after different people reached out to me:

• Atomic Habits by James Clear—recommended to a friend who is looking to start building some new habits

• Refresh by Shona Murray—recommended to a young mom who is trying to figure out what rest looks like

• All the Colors of the Dark by Chris Whitaker—recommended to my sister, who was looking for a darker fiction read

I managed to read 15 books this month, numbering more than 5,00 pages. Maybe it had something to do with no social media on my phone. Five were print, one was on my Kindle, and the rest were audiobooks.

I will eventually include these books in roundups and give more detailed reviews, but just as a disclaimer, some of these books may contain content that is triggering (murder, references to sex, abuse, etc.) so please don’t read them without looking into them (I’m happy to give more details if you ask!).

Fiction

1. The Quiet Game by Greg Iles

2. Bear by Julia Phillips

3. The God of the Woods by Liz Moore

4. The Good Earth by Pearl S. Buck

Nonfiction

1. The Genius of Judy: How Judy Blume Rewrote Childhood for All of Us by Rachelle Bergstein

2. Slow Productivity: The Lost Art of Accomplishment Without Burnout by Cal Newport

3. Cold Crematorium: Reporting from the Land of Auschwitz by József Debreczeni

4. How Reading Changed My Life by Anna Quindlen

5. The Devil at His Elbow: Alex Murdaugh and the Fall of a Southern Dynasty by Valerie Bauerlein

6. American Injustice: Inside Stories from the Underbelly of the Criminal Justice System by David S. Rudolf

7. Stolen Focus: Why You Can’t Pay Attention—and How to Think Deeply Again by Johann Hari

8. The Devil Behind the Badge: The Horrifying Twelve Days of the Border Patrol Serial Killer by Rick Jervis

Spiritual / Devotional

1. To the Tenth Generation: God’s Heart for Your Family, Far into the Future by Ray and Jani Ortlund

2. You Are What You Love: The Spiritual Power of Habit by James K.A. Smith

3. The Emotionally Destructive Marriage: How to Find Your Voice and Reclaim Your Hope by Leslie Vernick

The book I could not put down this month was The Devil at His Elbow. Although it took place very close to us, I didn’t follow Alex Murdaugh’s murder trial at all. The only thing I knew going into the book was that he had been convicted of murdering his wife and son, and something had happened long before involving a boat crash. The book was incredibly written and was a wild ride through the history of the Lowcountry in South Carolina. It read like a fiction book and left me in a book hangover for several days.

If you’ve made it this far, congratulations! I’d love to know your January highlights, your favorite book from this month, something great that happened to you, or just whatever random thing you’d like to tell me. See you in February!